ut I fear, lest somehow, as the serpent deceived Eve by his craftiness, so your minds may be corrupted from the simplicity that is in Christ ( 2 Corinthians 11:3).
This verse presents the simplicity of the gospel of Christ in sharp contrast to the craftiness of the serpent. Eve was lead astray and deceived by the shrewdness of the serpent. She believed a falsehood and lost the blessed simplicity that is found in Christ.
What is this simplicity? It is not complex, not complicated, not elaborate, nor is it sophisticated. But when it comes to deception and craftiness, the more complicated and intricate the lie, the better. The more sophisticated it appears to be, the more it appeals to the unwary believer.
When the serpent beguiled Eve, he offered her something new and different. "You will be like God." He also contradicted God by saying, "You will not surely die." The serpent flattered Eve into thinking she knew something her husband did not know. Have you ever wondered why the serpent didn't go after Adam instead of Eve? Paul teaches that it was because women are more easily deceived (1 Tim. 2:14). The Bible teaches that this is one reason why God has ordained man to be the head of the home. He is not as likely to be beguiled as is the wife. This obviously does not mean that men have no moral problems; men are more capable of outright rebellion (as demonstrated by Adam's disobedience). But women are more capable of being led astray, all the while having good intentions.
Certainly men can be deceived also, but it is more often the case that they do the deceiving, and women do their bidding. One of the most grievous examples of this today is in the counseling industry. The counseling explosion is directed at women, and is sustained by the patronage of women. Women have provided a ready and willing audience for this particular sales pitch. Women have been told all kinds of horrendous lies at seminars and retreats, and even through the latest bestsellers at the local Christian bookstore. What are the kinds of lies they have been told?
One popular one is that your problems are all your parents' fault anyway. You are not responsible for your own problems, because they are the ones who brought you up -- and they did it wrong. What has happened to the doctrine of forgiveness and holiness? What has happened to that obscure verse somewhere about honoring your father and your mother? God didn't really say that did He? Like the first woman, we still listen to that particular line, "Did God really say . . .?"
Or if He did say it, He must have meant something else. He must have had someone else's parents in mind. We flatter ourselves into thinking that God's Word must not apply to our very own special problem, because we are so unique. And this is the same old deception that Eve encountered with the serpent.
Because women are especially prone to deception, women must have their guard up. Everything we hear must be weighed in light of Scripture. So what does a woman do who needs spiritual help? Here are a few suggestions.
1. Go to your husband first. He is your head and he is responsible before God to shepherd and pastor his home, starting with you. Do not go in order to accuse him of his problems; go to him humbly, seeking help for your problem (Eph. 5:23; 1 Cor 14:35).
2. If you have gone to him humbly (without any backhanded criticism), and he still does not want to counsel you, or he does not know how to counsel you, get his permission to seek pastoral and biblical counseling (Eph. 4:11-16).
3. If he is in outright rebellion himself (i.e. a hit man for the Mafia), don't wait to get his permission, just go get help. As with all human governments, your husband's authority over you is genuine, but it is not absolute. There are certain areas of your family life where the civil magistrate, or the elders of your church, have a legitimate jurisdictional interest. So if your situation is a drastic one, you may seek outside help -- but still do so respectfully (Acts 4:19).
4. Do not share your spiritual problem with all your friends. Sometimes talking about it just makes things worse. Many women are simply running their husbands down, and all in the name of seeking counsel and encouragement from friends. If it is not big enough to share with the elders of the church (or the police), so that they may step in to deal with your husband, then it is not big enough to share with anyone. And even if you are unnecessarily silent in a situation, you probably need the practice (Prov. 31:11).
5. Remember that there is no problem in the world that is new. Yours is not unique, and there is always a biblical answer for it. God has not left you without hope. But the hope He offers is found in His Word (Ecc. 1:9; 1 Cor. 10:13).
6. So be obedient to the Word, and weigh your husband's counsel, or the counsel of your elders, in the light of God's Word (Acts 17:11).
7. This is not something you can do unless you are very much in the Word yourself. In many situations, it is no wonder we don't know what to do -- we aren't in the Word. How can we know what God requires if we are not reading what He has written (Dt. 8:3)?
8. Don't allow the counseling world (even the Christian counseling world) to label your problem with some fancy name. Calling it a syndrome does not changes anything. Sin is sin is sin. So if the Bible identifies something as sin, then confess it and repent of it (1 Jn. 1:9).
9. Stay away from books that get you to look inward instead of to Christ. He is all-sufficient for all the problems a married woman might have (Heb. 8:1).
10. Especially stay away from books that get you to think that you have problems that you never knew you had before. Do not be fooled by the line that you are uncovering "denial" (Gen. 3:5).
11. Guard against another popular trend in the modern counseling movement, which is to dig up all the hurt and misuse from the past. For Christians forgiveness is not the final goal, it is the starting point (Matt. 6:14-15).
12. And lastly, pray that your mind will not be led into deception and corruption, but will stay, remain, and dwell in the simplicity that is found in Christ (2 Cor. 11:2-3).
