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Volume 11, Issue 2: Verbatim

Quotations on Swishes

Various Saints and Clever Pagans

As the French say, there are three sexes - men, women, and clergymen.

Reverend Sidney Smith

Reverend Daniel Wise put the matter in a way both flattering to the feminine ego and expressive of ministerial fears: the pulpit alone is not sufficient to accomplish the immense task of social conservatism he saw as its duty. "There is," he announced thunderously, a "power behind the schoolroom and the church which is capable of neutralizing the effects of both: maternal influence."

Ann Douglas

We have gone on till we have become so debased, that it is worthy of question, why women are not teachers. So truly have we come to the same weakness as they. These things I have said not from any desire to elate them, but to shame ourselves, to chastise, and to admonish us, that so we may resume the authority that belongs to us, not inasmuch as we are greater in size, but because of our foresight, our protection of them, and our virtue.

John Chrysostom

Well I'm not dumb, but I can't understand why she walked like a woman, but talked like a man.

The Kinks

I am crushingly aware how inadequate most of us are, in our actual and historical individualities, to fill the place prepared for us. But it is an old saying in the army that you salute the uniform not the wearer. Only one wearing the masculine uniform can (provisionally, and till the Parousia) represent the Lord to the Church: for we are all, corporately and individually, feminine to Him. We men make very bad priests. This is because we are insufficiently masculine. It is no cure to call in those who are not masculine at all. A given man may make a very bad husband; you cannot mend matters by trying to reverse the roles. He may make a bad male partner in a dance. The cure for that is that men should more diligently attend dancing classes; not that the ballroom should henceforward ignore distinctions of sex and treat all dancers as neuter. That would, of course, be eminently sensible, civilized, and enlightened, but, once more, "not near so much like a Ball."

C.S. Lewis

The bonds of nineteenth-century liberal clergymen with their female parishioners were apt to be close ones which formed early, and held. It is important to remember at this point that a significant number of non-evangelical ministers had been delicate, even sickly, homebound little boys. Ministers often exalted the maternal impulse because it had been a key force in their own lives.

Ann Douglas

The very women of these heretics, how wanton they are! For they are bold enough to teach, dispute, to enact exorcisms, to undertake cures-it may be even to baptize.... Nowhere is promotion easier than in the camp of rebels, where the mere fact of being there is a foremost service.

Tertullian

Dude (Looks like a lady).

Aerosmith

If a woman feels that it is better to be relatively tall and muscular than relatively short and elastic, she may be tempted to ignore the evidence presented by the physiologist who demonstrates that height and muscularity will be associated with the man whether she likes it or not. The feminist can argue that when a society is endangered the women `get' the men to risk their lives while they remain safely at home, and she can argue that the woman's longevity is superior to the male's dominance. But if she believes that it is preferable to have her sex associated with authority and leadership rather than with the creation of life, then she is doomed to perpetual disappointment.

Steven Goldberg

And this must be said of all men in general: God has set them above women, and yet, if they do not rule themselves wisely, and thus fail to live up to their rank, it will be to their greater shame. They will be degraded both before God and before the world, and their foolishness and laziness will, of necessity, be the better known.

John Calvin

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