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Volume 13, Issue 1: Cave of Adullam

Mutterings on the Regnant Follies

Pablo MacArthur

Hobgoblins of Little Minds
Barnes and Noble, in conjunction with the Anti-Defamation League, have put out a spunky little booklet called Close the Book on Hate: 101 Ways to Combat Prejudice. Number 76 reads this way: "Invite clergy representing religions different from your own to participate in services and deliver the sermon."

Too late. In modern evangelical churches we already have different religions represented in the sermons. And sometimes we can even have up to three or more religions in the same sermon.

It Figures Dept.
The Christian Wrestling Federation debuted in May with twelve wrestlers doing their thang in front of about four hundred spectators. The wrestlers included gentlemen like "Apocalypse" and "Jesus Freak." When the final match was over, they all went down to the ring for a joint prayer and altar call. Ministry first.

What we really need is a Reformed Wrestling Federation. You know - BavinckMan! The Turretin Tower! The Beza Blaster!

Barney Fife Memorial Church
A newspaper report informs us that episodes of The Andy Griffith Show are being used by hundreds of church groups in twenty states as the basis for their, um, lessons. One of the developers of the concept, Joey Fann, said, "The last thing this is supposed to be is a deep discussion of theology."

Achieving a well-set goal is a wonderful thing. I think I'll hit the ground with my hat.

Sign of the Cross Pattern
We learn lots of things from church flyers. Have one right here that has a picture of a football and which then goes on to say, "Our fall worship schedule allows time for your other religion." The copy continues, helpfully urging the faithful on to greater and greater accomplishments "Chances are you can catch our opening song and worship service before kick-off. And remember when it comes time for that fourth-quarter Hail Mary pass, it wouldn't hurt to have a little praying under our belts."

This church's pastor, incidentally, is named Douglas Jones. As much as we would like to find one, there is no relation, at least that we could find.

Hyper-Arminians
The phrase hyper-Arminian might make some think of open theism and stuff like that. But a much more greasy form of man-centered-save-yourself-if-you-can-and-devil-take-the-hindmost form of Arminianism can be found in a publication called Outside the Camp. The central thesis which pervades their sanctimonious merit-mongering is that all Arminians are unregenerate, as well as any Calvinists who say that it is possible for an Arminian to be regenerate. In their soteriology, theological perfection in sanctification is necessary for salvation.

The title of their publication is apparently taken from Deuteronomy 23:13-14. But some people always forget their shovel.

Soliciting More Reader Feedback from NJ
Many pro-life Christians were dismayed when Bush decided to appoint Gov. Christie Todd-Whitman as the head of the EPA. They pointed with legitimate concern to her pro-abortion stance.

But experience still counts for something. After all, Gov. Whitman has already been the governor of a toxic waste dump for quite a number of years now.

Holy Ghost Dynamo
And yet another church flyer invites us to "come out and experience the life-changing, supernatural, Holy Ghost dynamo of a preacher who will have you on the edge of your seat every night - guaranteed!"

We can't think of a clever comment for this one. Do your own.

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