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Volume 15, Issue 2: Sharpening Iron


From Us:

Some things are too big to be limited by such small and trivial walls as purpose and responsibility. The cover of this magazine is one such beast. Born of a fevered brain, it was assigned a task. Instead, it became its own creature. Wandering the fields, you can hear this cover moan at night. It creeps into barns to sleep, running from the voice of its master. Our voice. It follows its own law, on a quest to scare small children and the unsuspecting passerby of the coffee table. We expect women to hide it. Or so they think. They are actually hiding from it.

It is not our fault. Curiosity killed Eve first, and many others after her. We were just next in line. All we wanted to know was what happened when a Thomas Kinkade bred with a romance novel. We were suspecting a smallish mutt with odd coloring. We were surprised. It turns out the two were more than compatible. Closer than members of the same breed. Instead of a cheap, small, inexpensive sentiment that would behave itself around the house, and never muss the carpet, the images met and begat what could not have been anticipated. The child of their twisted union has a name. Über-tripe has come into the world.


 

From You:

CRAFT MORECARONI #1
Dear Editor,
What is "Craft Morecaroni and Cheese?" Do you think you could post a little history about this?

Chris Marr
Groton, CN

Nathan Wilson replies: Those happily out of the loop, please ignore. Otherwise, a little while back a few gentlemen were declared to be heretics by the RPCUS down Southaway. Those gentlemen were my own father and editor, Douglas Wilson, John Barach of the Great White North, Steve Wilkins, and Steve Schlissel. There was no trial, or any evidence cited, simply a list of supposed theological offenses (in some lovely prose I might add) and a call for them all be defrocked and excommunicated. Point of squeamishness? Last issue's "Thema" (15/1) was a classic example of their heresy.

CRAFT MORECARONI #2
Dear Editor,
It is beneath the calling with which you've been called to hurl insults after insults or reviling after revilings.

You are to entrust yourself to Him Who judges justly. Duck.
The Craft Morecaroni ad was ugly.

Susan D. Becker
Alpharetta, GA

Editor's reply: Four men are hung without a trial with accompanying demands that they be formally declared as hellbound. We reply with box mac `n' cheese imagery.

CRAFT MORECARONI #3
Dear Editor,
As a longtime C/A subscriber, I am often at once delighted and outraged at the articles that appear in your publication. In this past issue, I was for the first time appalled. I am referring, of course, to the back cover and to the more subliminal inside cover which mockingly attack a brother in Christ, Joe Morecraft. I have for some time followed the ongoing and unfortunate events between Joe on the one hand, and Wilson et al on the other. And while I do not know all the details of this feud, it is apparent that the process outlined in Matthew 18 has either run its course, and you have concluded that Mr. Morecraft is to be regarded as an unbeliever, or the process has been simply abandoned. My understanding of that process is that it is to be undertaken with the goal of reconciliation among the parties. If, in fact, Mr. Morecraft has been unresponsive to your overtures (again, I don't know the details), wouldn't your time be better spent working and praying for such reconciliation rather than engaging in sniping and mockery? How can such treatment of one's brother possibly be considered acceptable behavior among God's people? I fear you do shame yourselves and harm the cause of Christ by such behavior. While I appreciate your work and your stand for the truth of God's Word, I implore you to repent of such childishness—even if your brother is dead wrong. Grow up.

Stuart Pope
Newport News, VA

Douglas Wilson replies: Thanks first for the admonishment, and the spirit in delivering it. While we do differ over the propriety of the ad, we fully understand how these things can look from a middle distance, and we know it is not pretty. But for the record, we do not regard Pastor Morecraft as an unbeliever, and would be more than willing to come to the Lord's table together with him. Thus far, an unwillingness to attempt serious discussion or efforts at reconciliation has been entirely on his part, and yes, there have been multiple private overtures on our part. And last, with regard to the substance of your rebuke, we do believe that the Scriptures provide us with a pattern to follow in such things. Our Lord compared teachers of Israel to blind sight-seeing guides, pointing out the covenantal sights with their white canes. We, in a much milder vein, compared the great Presbyterian un-trial to a bowl of hastily prepared macaroni and cheese. In our reading of Scripture, religious hubris ofthe type displayed in that travesty of a trial/investigation/whatever-it-was was ordained by a holy God in order to be lampooned.

As far as growing up goes, "unless ye be as little children. . ."

CRAFT MORECARONI #4
Dear Editor,
Ouch! I tried your recipe for "Craft Morecaroni." This isn't something that just any "Joe" can stomach. I thought you would want to know that no matter how much sugar you add to the Craft recipe, it still comes out bitter (Prov 18:13). Not many "Southern Gentlemen" left, I guess, sorry.

By the way, someone has got to give Doug Jones something to do around that place! He has got far too much time to do the "research" for the "Cretan Times." He must be neglecting his wife and children for the sake of his "work" (how do I get a job like that?).

Chori Seraiah
Salem, OR

Editor's reply: Sorry. We're not hiring any more heretics. Quota's full.

ENOUGH ABOUT MORECRAFT
Dear Editor,
. . . How come you guys missed the obvious in the "Cave of Adullam" piece on RaptureLetters.com? Who did they hire to make sure the letters went out after they were all raptured and what made them think the left behind pagans would continue to send them out once they were gone?

Dick Taylor
Berryville, VA

Editor's reply: This is of course something that we have given much thought. No doubt they hired someone with terrific assurance, and asked them to sit at a computer with one thumb on the space bar until the rapture. When the key is released, rapture emailing commences. There is the scent of a terrific prank in the air. Raptureletters false alarm? All Christian hackers should feel it their duty to get those letters sent out tomorrow!

AND BECAUSE WE NEED IT
Dear Editor,
Although my older sister, younger sister, older brother, younger brother, father and mother all think you're mean, I don't.

. . . Keep cutting with, as well as being sharpened by, the Sword.

Jeff Pennington
Wales, WI

Editor's reply: Thanks. Can you get between our shoulder blades? That's where it's itchiest.

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