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Volume 16, Issue 2: Sharpening Iron


From Us:

The last time we were arrested, the policeman said it was for lewd behavior. Of course it wasn't. At least not really. Policemen say some funny things. Especially in San Francisco.

While we were being driven away, we looked out the window and saw a man waggling a sign at us. It said, "No Hate Here," followed by four exclamation points. With his other hand he waggled his longest and central finger. We chuckled.
"Hey," we asked the cop in front. "Can you roll down the window back here? We need to say something to that guy."
"No," the cop said. We asked why not, but he didn't answer.
Authority figures have always misunderstood us. We only wanted to tell the expressive man that exclamatory punctuation ought to come in odd numbers. They always look funny in pairs. Of course our finger-waving friend looked as if he was less concerned with over-similar pairs than we might be. He probably just wanted things to be symmetrical, to be the same on both sides. Slightly akimbo suits us a little better.
We prefer Risk. Or even Stratego. And when we're drinking milk, Chess. He'd prefer Go Fish or worse, travel-size Connect Four.
Our mother won't be happy. We promised we'd behave. We didn't start it. The sad woman did. And we didn't even say anything. But apparently laughing, at least laughing that way in this place, can be lewd. San Francisco is a very serious place.
We'll never get to go on choir tour.

 

From You:

BULLY FOR YOU, ETC.
Dear Editor,
Thank you so much for all the labors, trials, tribulations that you've endured, for your example through them, and your ministry despite them.

I've learned much. From courtship and marriage (which I will enter into on October 9, 2004) to reclaiming Christmas from my former Reformed stodginess and "keeper of the true flame" mentality. The humor and class you all write with is top notch. Please do not be discouraged by any letters criticizing unheard tone in articles. You've changed my mind and my fiancee's on a number of subjects by showing how truly ridiculous it was.
God bless you richly.

Ben Otero
Philadelphia, PA

ON OUR HALF-BOTTOMED FUNDRAISING LETTERS
Dear Editor,
You should just send a bill.

We lost the name
Sierra San Pedro

JARED'S NOT A BULLDOG ANT
Dear Editor,
Our family's just devoured the Irony issue [16/1]. It's the first time I've seen my homeland, New Zealand, referred to in C/A. You should visit sometime—most of the ants are just the regular black ones, not too scary.

I appreciated Jared Miller's article on the imprecatory psalms. The way he dealt with the purpose of the prayers (for conversion) was insightful, as was the understanding that the claimant is not self-righteous, but also opening himself up to God's searching and justice.
But I think Jared held back in the final paragraph. Can the enemy we pray against be spiritualized to being merely "unbelief"? David sings, "Do not I hate them, O Lord, that hate thee? and am I not grieved with those that rise up against thee? I hate them with perfect hatred: I count them mine enemies" (Ps
139:21-22). David does not declare his hatred for the idea of God-hating, but for the God-haters themselves. Unbelief clothes itself in flesh and blood.
Thanks for a great, stimulating publication.

Neil van der Wel
Geelong, Australia

Editor's reply: You're right. We think Jared held back too. But only because it was his turn. We try to be very balanced. One of us holds back every issue.

HURRAH
Dear Editor,
I read every word of C/A that gets into my hands. Thank you for this thought-sparking/faith-stretching/assumptions-challenging publication. I absolutely love the humor!

Joanne B. Evans
Anacortes, WA

APRIL FOOL'S
Dear Editor,
I hope you will let us know about the April Fool's Day pranks that I am sure went on out there. I put blue food coloring in my husband's Coffee Mate liquid—he went to work with a blue tongue. Ha!

Mary Swerens
Fort Wayne, IN

Editor's reply: We were a little boring this year. But it's only hibernation, nothing permanent.

ANDREW'S NEAT
Dear Editor,
I am ten years old and I enjoy reading C/A, especially the story of Andrew. Thank you.

Isabel Forrey
Meridian, ID

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