Volume 17, Issue 5: Meander
A Mouth Full of Teeth
Ten Reasons to Not Take Postmodernism Seriously
1. Postmodernists take themselves seriously
2. It might make some sense to speak of the
"post-colonial" era if one or two hundred years have gone by
since the era in question has assumed room temperature. But
until then, you can't really see it, and ought not pretend as
though you can. For all we know, future historians will be
describing our century as the era of African Anglicanism. Make sure
you will actually make it out of the footnotes of the future
before you name the entire thing after yourself.
3. Related to this, as a general rule, movements ought
not name themselves, and they should never name themselves
if they have a case of Little Man Syndrome. In
ecclesiastical circles, this is the only safe way to avoid the Third Wave
of Glory phenomenon emanating from places like Tulsa, or
to keep the Latter Rain spoken of by the prophet Joel
from showing up in Pensacola.
3. Movements that name themselves
chronologically ought to take better care about getting the chronology kind
of right. It makes no sense to launch the post-prandial
discussions before the sandwiches get there.
4. Movements that set themselves apart from
other movements ought to do a better job of actually
setting themselves apart. Postmodernism needs to be more
than chapter thirteen in modernity's book, which is still
enjoying brisk sales. Black hat Mennonites ought not to think that
their rupture with the white hat Mennonites goes to the very
root of the matter, starting a new chapter in human history.
5. Breathless excitement about future developments
not yet seen is a great sales technique. A glossy prospectus
usually wows them. So do blurbs and references from all the
respected scholars. But the entire while, the hand should hover
nervously over the wallet, and the person getting the sales rush
should anticipate soon getting to the part where he needs to
recruit his friends and get them to sell vitamins too. Brazen
displays of sales technique mean that something is for sale.
6. I am afraid they kind of got their groove on too
soon. Postmodernism brought sex up way too early in the
discussion, and made it obvious that the point of going up to
the apartment was actually not to see those
watercolors. Postmodern man has to work a little harder to make her
(or him, no harsh theonomic judgmentalism here!) think that he
is really interested in her/him as an I-Thou kind of person
in the context of a caring relationship. All while fumbling
with the top button. Not everybody can do that, and it has to
be said that postmodernism has too obvious a leer, and
hands like a couple of ten-pound hams. "Mon
cheri, do you ever wonder what Sartre meant when he said . . ."
7. Books written by postmodernists are books that
are way too full of words. And all of them could have used a
corn-fed editor who used to play left tackle at Nebraska, and
who was brought up in the Assemblies of God. "Jacques,
this doesn't make any sense, man."
8. All the usual suspects like postmodernism, and
they carry on with it in their usual way. Postmodern prophets
and seers get their edgy worldview from places like CNN
and then find the contours of this trendy worldview right
there, in the Bible! It turns out that the prophet Isaiah was
wrestling with women's issues and ozone depletion, just like us!!
And the biblical worldview is just what we were all
thinking already!!! Talk about luck!!!!
9. Relying on Europeans with a bad case of the
epistemological fantods is no way to rebuild a civilization.
10. Movements that contradict themselves in flagrant ways cannot, with regard to the long run, rely on
Rushdoony on Porn
Back in the eighties I read through a small hill of
Rushdoony's books, profiting greatly from many of them. One that I
was never able to get my hands on was his The Politics of
Pornography. But it has just been released again by Ross House
Books under the new title Noble Savages. The folks there were
kind enough to send me a review copy, which I gladly read.
This book is simply outstanding. Anyone who wants to
understand the real fuel that is making the fires of pornography
burn needs to get and read this book.