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Volume 7, Issue 4: Cave of Adullam

Mutterings on the Regnant Follies

Angus McCrank

More Good News on the Revival Front
A friend of Credenda in South Africa has let us know that the Toronto blessing has spread to his country, and has been seen there dashing down some new back alleys of blessing. Seems that some folks are now getting into animal noises and "vomiting in the Spirit."

Of course, who's to say whether this might not be of the Lord. After all, we don't want to be found opposing a marvelous work and a wonder. After all, we . . . oh, never mind. Stupidity on wheels.

Nuh Uh
National Review reports on an opinion piece written by the First Lady for the Los Angeles Times, entitled "There is No Such Thing as 'Other People's Children.'" The thrust of her argument made it clear that all American children should be considered to be children of the state. And presumably the programs that would follow from such a belief would require us to eliminate that other pesky distinction, the concept of Other People's Money.

And to this, we would like to apply Mencken's appraisal of FDR, the president who thought America was a giant milch cow with 200 million teats.

Out of the Shade Dade
The Moneychanger tells us that Florida taxpayers coughed up $18,500 to make Dade County's only nude beach wheel-chair accessible. Another $20,000-30,000 will go into provision of closer parking for the handicapped.

But it seems clear they've been out in the sun too long already.1

Pave the Planet Foundation
Sierra Club Chairman Michael McCloskey was quoted in Wake-Up Call America as saying something like this - "Trees and rocks have rights to their own freedom."

All is one. Everything must be free. Each blessed thing must have equal access to its very own space, with room to breathe the fresh, clean, mountain air--trees, rocks, moss, wolves, whales, Burger Kings, and plastic. All is one with the bulldozer, chain saw and owl. I am the eggman, I am the walrus, goo goo ga-joob.

Evangelical Elvis Art
New Man, the magazine for Promise Keepers, found itself stuck with an ad for a series of prints entitled "Knights of the 90s." The main print, and please bear with us as we describe it, showed a man in a tuxedo with a helmet under his left arm and a broadsword resting on the ground, balanced by his right hand. A burnt orange sky was the backdrop, also containing skyscrapers and a mystic moon, or a blimp maybe. Around the rim of the picture was the Code of Honor for the Knights of the 90s - Integrity, Courage, Charity, Romance, Patriotism, Justice, and Righteousness.

The only problem with this chronological approach to knighthood is that after the year 2000 we will have to be Knights of the Zeroes. And maybe we already are.

Hoot hoot hoot
While surfing the Net,2 we noticed that this washed ashore. The ACLU has filed suit against a government school district in Louisiana for, get this, encouraging the students to keep open minds and exercise critical thinking skills. The Tangipahoa Parish Board of Education adopted a resolution which required teachers to read a disclaimer in advance of any lesson concerning evolution. They said, "It is hereby recognized . . . that the lesson to be presented, regarding the origin of life and matter, is known as the Scientific Theory of Evolution and should be presented to inform students of the scientific concept and not intended to influence or dissuade the Biblical version of Creation or any other concept. It is further recognized by the Board of Education that it is the basic right and privilege of each student to form his/her own opinion or maintain beliefs taught by parents on this very important matter of the origin of life and matter. Students are urged to exercise critical thinking and gather all information possible and closely examine each alternative before forming an opinion."

Everything was okay until they encouraged students to think for themselves. After that, a lawsuit was just inevitable.

Sexual Dyslexia
National Review reports on the dither folks are in because of their preparations for the Fourth World Conference on Women, which is sponsored by the UN, and is to be held in Peking. The fracas is over definition of "gender" which the U.S., Canada, and the European Union want defined as including five of them. Many of the other nations, set in their ways, are nonplussed with all this, having thought that there were only two - male and female. The five we are fighting for are male, female, homosexual, bisexual, and transsexual.

But what about toasters? And avocados?

Doubts About the Existence of Idaho
We found a whimsical essay circulating the country which casts doubt on the existence of our commonwealth, Idaho. It suggests, "Mounting evidence shows that there are in fact only 49 states in the U.S., and the 'state' of Idaho is a baseless myth. All we ask is that the existence of the state of Idaho be debated. Time after time our opponents have refused to debate us on the facts. . . . All of the so-called 'evidence' is a mixture of falsifications, coercions, lies, and exaggerations."

Normally, people just confuse us with Iowa.

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