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Volume 16, Issue 5: Virga
Gormet Boil
Matt Whitling
Water in a pot rolled and then bubbled as the red electric burner began to expand and glow. A
dancing waterfall of steam rose to the track-lighting above
and condensed on the cool glass shades skirting three
unlit bulbs. Even the kitchen mouse traps had been lulled into
a semiconscious doze. Afternoon was blending into
evening as the shadows began to pour themselves out across
the front yard, extending their dominion toward the street.
In the pot, each hot, clear bubble sacrificed itself in a
joyous enunciation of the transition, but no one heard. No
one came to celebrate this quiet little bar mitzvah between
roll and boil. The water boiled alone while the lid on
the steamy pot began to talk and clap out a rhythm of its own. All of
the daytime inhabitants of the house were tucked away out of
sight. Bedrooms, kitchen, dinning room, den, and living room all sat
silently with an expectant air of exhalation from each. Mouths were open
and window shades had been pulled up so that each room could gaze out through the
warm evening light that flooded in. Only the basement
remained closed and dark.
Loving your children through consistent
biblical discipline requires time, and the more children you
have, the more time and energy it will demand. An
additional factor on the plate is that even in a relatively small
group of children, the odds are that you will have one or
more that are what our family calls "high-maintenance
kids." High maintenance kids require twice as many hugs
and spanks, and three times as much love and instruction
as the rest of the bunch. This extra time and work is
an investment of faith and it will pay off, but not right
away. On top of it all, there are certain seasons in
your children's lives that will require an increased amount
of time and instruction from you. These could be called
high maintenance seasons. What some folks call the
"terrible two's" is an example of this sort of season.
I can remember days when I left for work at 7:00
in the morning and kissed my wife as she took one of
our sons down to the basement, only to return at 4:30 with
the same two individuals down there doing the same sort
of business. These were particular seasons of
intense discipline in which my wife needed encouragement,
actual physical help, and the covenantal backing of her
husband. There are a host of things that a husband should be
doing in times like these in order to back his wife up, but
only one has direct implications toward the use of cheese in
the discipline process.
"Sweetheart, I don't care if the clothes are
washed, the house is cleaned, or dinner is made—your primary
job is to love our son, and what he needs most right now is
to be held accountable for his actions and specifically
his attitude toward you."
One of the lies surrounding sin is that it is
overwhelming and impossible to deal with. For example, it
is evident to many parents that their children do not
obey cheerfully or immediately, and it is just as evident to
them that if they started addressing those particular sins
it would consume not only the morning, but the whole
day, or several days, and by implication the rest of their
lives—therefore tackling these sins in any concerted
fashion seems impossible. "You don't realize what our kids
are like. We just don't have the time or energy to deal
with anything other than the big issues." In reality, however,
if parents work diligently to teach, train, and
enforce cheerful obedience in the home when the children
are young, they will end up with more time for other
duties, not less. A home in which the children are required
to obey right away, all the way, and with a good
attitude every day is a home in which Mom has time to tend to
all of the duties that she has been called to. The paradox
is that parents need to be willing in principle to give
up those other duties in order to love and nurture
their children through certain seasons of life. It is a father's
job to identify these seasons and to make sure that he takes
up the slack in the schedule and bears the brunt of the load
as he leads his family. For starters, this means bringing
home dinner or cooking it yourself, taking on some of
the cleaning duties around the house, and making sure
that your wife has an adequate Sabbath rest each week. As
a husband learns to give himself away for his family, he
will find that the more he gives away, the more he has.
The basement, of course, played the antagonist in
all household politics. Dark, sinister, and unfinished, it
had its own decor of cobwebs and glistening concrete.
Close steep stairs served to welcome visitors down into
its bowels. This, of course, is where all the people were
that early evening—doing dark business down in the
basement. A hard but loving business followed by the
peaceful fruit of righteousness, rest, and time. Dinner will be
ready in ten minutes, or when the noodles are soft.
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Copyright © 2007 Credenda/Agenda. All rights reserved.
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